What are you telling yourself?

09/12/2013 - Feeling overwhelmed? Here’s why

Psychologists suggest that it is not external experiences that contribute to our stress, but rather our thoughts and feelings.

Here’s a list of ten cognitive distortions that may be weighing you down, and some helpful examples of “counter” statements you can use to get you in a far healthier state of mind:

1. All or Nothing Thinking:  Seeing things in black and white; that if one thing goes wrong you think you are a total failure.

Counter Statement:  “This is just one event that didn’t go the way I planned, but it doesn’t mean I’m not a successful person.”

2. Overgeneralization:  When something bad happens, you overgeneralize and think that something bad is always happening to you, when in fact, it isn’t.

Counter Statement:  “It seems the whole world is against me sometimes, but I know that’s really not true; many good things do come my way.”

3. Mental Filter:  You only see the negative in a situation and ignore the positive.

Counter Statement:  “My boss didn’t like my marketing plan, but she really loved my choice of graphic design.”

4. Disqualifying the Positive:  Finding a reason to not accept positive feedback.

Counter Statement:  “It made me feel good when my co-worker said I did a great job on my presentation. I know she meant it.”

5. Jumping to Conclusions:  When you make a negative interpretation and conclusion even though there are no definite facts for it.

Counter Statement:  “This traffic looks pretty bad, but I know I’ll make it home eventually.”

6. Catastrophizing:  You exaggerate the importance of things and they become way beyond their reality.

Counter Statement:  “My boss didn’t get back to me when he said he would, but I’m sure he’s just busy. I can check in with him again at another time.”

7. Emotional Reasoning:  This is when you assume that your negative emotions reflect the way things really are.

Counter Statement:  “I might feel a little undervalued, but when I take a step back I do see that my hard work is acknowledged.”

8. Should Statements:  When you try to motivate yourself by having too many “should” and “shouldn’t” about how you should act, or how the world should be.

Counter Statement:  “It’s healthy for me to accept some things the way they are.”

9. Labelling:  Giving yourself or others a definitive label that cannot be an accurate description.

Counter Statement:  “I know it’s not helpful to say that I’m weak or a failure. I’m a good person and I can grow, learn, and improve myself.”

10. Personalization:  When you see yourself as personally responsible for an outside event; basically, you confuse influence with control.

Counter Statement:  “The downturn has affected the economy in unforeseen ways, but I’m doing well at steering my business in the right direction.”

Copyright © 2013 Newfangled Ideas, All rights reserved.


About Lateral Love™ Australia

Lateral Love™ Australia Lateral Love Australia is an information network devoted to bringing lateral violence for Aboriginal & Islander (including the Torres Strait) Peoples of Australia into the public arena. Lateral Love™ Australia aims to share truthful information about the history of Australia, highlighting the deliberate impact of colonisation, and the damage made to the Human Spirit regardless of race due the manifestations of lateral violence. William Brian Butler & his niece Nicola Butler are the individuals behind the "Lateral Love & Spirit of Care for all Humankind 2012 - 2022 Campaign". This campaign is a product of the culmination of the life works of William Brian Butler and Nicola Butler creating an ongoing, living, breathing environment for positive discussions, development of resources and suggestions for change that will have a lasting impact for Human Rights, Social Inclusion and the Spiritual and Emotional Wellbeing for all Aboriginal and Islander peoples in this country.
This entry was posted in Care for Self, Caring & Sharing, Contemplation, Cultural Safety, Elders, Empowerment, First Nations Health, Harmony, Healing, Health, Healthy Communication, Humanity, Identity, Inner Voice, Inspiration, Kindness, Knowledge, Lateral Love, Lateral Love Australia, Lateral Violence, Laughter, Leadership, Life, Love, Nurturing, Positive Actualisation, Positive Interactions, Positive Participation, Positive Steps Forward, Purpose of Intent, Reflection, Reflexivity, Respect, Self Actualisation, Self Determination Principles, Self Evaluation, Self Love, Self Worth, Sense of Purpose, Spirituality, Storytelling, Suicide Prevention, The Decade of Lateral Love, The Lateral Violence in your Head, Transformation, Truth, Unity, Wisdom, Yarning and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to What are you telling yourself?

  1. The timing of this is spot on for me personally, so, thank you!

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